A few months ago, my daughter and her husband decided to plan a weekend away with some very good friends of theirs. We all talked about it at a family function. It was decided that my long time friend and I would share the weekend watching the kids. All we needed was a date that was good for all. Ha Ha!!! That is a feat in itself, considering everyone’s schedule. After many emails, my daughter cleared with my friend that last weekend was good.
My daughter lives just a few blocks from us so I was not worried about leaving John alone for that period of time. We planned a few activities with the kids, weather permitting. These activities were also close so if there was a problem I could get home for his needs.
A few days before this weekend, another good friend of ours who lives in Atlanta was coming up North to visit his parents. His mom had broken her pelvis and was in a rehab center. We are all at this age where our families are getting older and need caregiving so he needed to make the trip to check on her. We scheduled him to come and visit us on Saturday afternoon for lunch. It worked out for me because I was glad that he would be with John while I was with my friend and the kids. My son also came down to visit him. Our friend is my son’s godfather and the two are very close. So we went our way with the kids and I was relaxed because I did not have to worry that John was alone in case something happened.
After a few hours, we returned home and said our goodbyes to our friend and son. We all went our separate ways. Since everything was going so smoothly, we decided to go to church with the kids and then to dinner. John was very tired and decided to stay home.
After church and dinner I returned home to see how things were. The plan was for me to stay a little while, get him ready for bed and then go back to my daughter’s house and have a girl’s night with my friend. Like I said tell God your plans, Ha! When I got back around 9, John was telling me that he had taken his temperature and he had a fever. He was not feeling well and did not want to stay alone. Well I do not need to tell you how I felt. I had been looking forward to this for a while. Just a few hours of girl time with my friend. Nothing special, a few glasses of wine, good talk and a lot of laughing with no one listening to what we say. Anyway, I was furious, sad, felt badly for him etc. Still at this time I had a problem that needed to be solved. John and I decided to call our son. He kindly said yes and came to stay with his dad.
As I always say, caregiving is a family matter. My friend told me when I got back to my daughter’s house that I could have stayed and she would have been fine with the kids. I thank my son for his help that weekend. It is necessary for the caregiver to get a few hours away even if it is only ten blocks away. My family and friends are the best. My kids help out a lot, so does our extended family. We cannot get through life without love and support. This includes both physical and mental support. Life does not work out the way you plan. As I said tell God your plans, Ha Ha; it is always a laugh to watch what happens.